Ülle Ernits: A child's wellbeing and the right to stay with their mother in Estonia

Estonian child welfare advocate Ülle Ernits argues that while no child should bear adult responsibilities or care for a parent at night, this does not automatically justify separating a mother from her children. The opinion piece challenges the assumption that family separation is the default solution to parenting difficulties.

In Estonia, a growing debate around child welfare and family rights has prompted Ülle Ernits to speak out on what she sees as a troubling trend in how authorities handle difficult family situations. Her core argument is clear: no child should be placed in a position where they must assume adult responsibilities or provide nighttime care for a parent — but this alone should not be grounds for removing children from their mother.

Ernits draws a crucial distinction between identifying a problem within a family and leaping to the most drastic of solutions. Separation, she argues, is not a neutral administrative act — it carries profound and lasting psychological consequences for both children and parents. The existence of hardship in a household does not, by itself, make removal the appropriate or proportionate response.

The piece raises questions about whether Estonian child protection systems are adequately weighing the harm caused by separation against the risks they are trying to prevent. Ernits suggests that support services, community involvement, and targeted assistance should be exhausted before any decision to remove children from their home is made.

At the heart of Ernits's argument lies a principle that has gained increasing attention in child welfare discussions across Europe: a child's bond with their parent, and particularly their mother, is itself a vital component of that child's wellbeing. Severing that bond, even with the best of intentions, can cause damage that outlasts the original problem it was meant to solve.